"EDEN" relationships

Harley sat on the hood of Dylan’s car, legs crossed, hoodie zipped up to her throat even though it was warm out. Her brown hair sprawled beneath her head. The ocean was a black smear behind them, loud but invisible. Dylan was lying on the roof, one leg hanging off the side, sneaker tapping lightly against the windshield. She could see his sea glass eyes staring up lazily. He grew into his jersey. He didn't let his sandy blonde hair grow. Thought the buzz cut made him look older. It did. He looked like a man. An awkward, weird little man.

“You ever think about just...not doing any of it?” she asked, voice flat. Not sad. Just curious.

“Any of what?”“

What comes after, school.”

Dylan laughed under his breath. “Like what, just stay here forever and rot?”

“I don't know” she said, tugging her sleeves down over her hands. 

There was a pause. The sky above was so full of nothing it almost seemed heavy. No stars. Just haze.

“Vanessa would hate that” Dylan said. “She says dying’s only cool if you’re good-looking and under twenty. College will be fun.”

“Liar” Harley muttered. He didn’t say anything. He’d learned not to argue when she was like this—teeth bared behind a smile. "You’re addicted to people needing you” she said softly. “It’s pathetic.” 

He turned his head. “What do you want from me?

“I dunno. Maybe just someone to witness the slow unraveling of my genius. You’re decent at staring.”

They stayed like that for another hour. Talking about nothing. Making up stories about the people in the passing cars. Saying they’d drive to Maine tomorrow. Or New York. Or maybe just around the block, twice, because they were broke. They both went quiet again. A seagull screamed somewhere in the dark. “

"You know you’d miss me,” she said without looking at him.

“I’d survive.”

She laughed. Loud and short and with real joy. Rolling onto her side, she spoke.

“I'm sure I watched you drop a grilled cheese on the floor and eat it anyway once.”

“It was a clean floor.”

“There’s no such thing as a clean floor.”

He looked at her then. Her expression was unreadable half amusement, half something else. She always carried that something else. Like she was perpetually on the edge of a decision you weren’t allowed to know about. 

Harley had her feet on the dash, one arm out the window, her hand cutting through the air like she was slicing the wind open. Boston went by in a flash. She raised the volume when she heard Hope Sandoval's voice coming softly from the speakers.

They shared a glance on the rear view mirror. He looked at her questioningly.

"What?"

“I was just thinking how boring your life would be without me.”

He scoffed, shifting lanes. “Yeah. Real tragedy.”

He hated when she got like this. It was like Harley had a clone. Harley was manic and had a penchant for trouble. She was beautiful in the way a fire is beautiful,just before it eats everything.Then there was Eden. Only he could see Eden. Because Eden would put her face in the crook of his neck and breathe deeply. Eden was lazy, she was always sleeping.

“No, really. Who else would poke holes in your delusions? Vanessa? She’s too polite. Jake’s too into his own reflection.”

“Maybe that’s the point,” Dylan said. “Maybe I’d be better off with people who didn’t... poke so hard.”

She laughed. A small, low sound. “You don’t want better, Dylan. You want interesting.”

“Maybe I’m done with interesting.”

Harley turned to him, her smile fading just enough to show the bones under it.

“No, you’re not.”

They pulled into the driveway, the porch light still flickering like it always had. She didn’t get out right away. Just sat there, staring at the house like it had personally betrayed her.

Her middle name is Eden. Like the garden, like something untouched, even if she's anything but. And me? I guess that makes me Cain. Not because It's my name. Not because I hate her. Because I love her too much to leave her untouched. The mark isn’t on my skin. It’s behind my eyes. I see her when I sleep. When I eat. When I breathe. 

Eden never had a chance.

“You’d rot without someone watching” she said slowly.

Dylan didn’t answer. He couldn’t. She opened the door but paused before stepping out, leaning in so close he could see the faded freckles under her makeup.

"You wouldn’t know who you are without me."

Then she was gone, the door slamming shut like a punctuation mark.

He sat there long after she disappeared inside.

Watching the porch light blink.

Off. On. Off. On. Off.

Not because I hated her. I didn't. Not even close. I loved her like a sickness, like something parasitic. I loved her so much I wanted to carve her out of the world so no one else could touch her. Not even God. Especially not Him. They always say Cain killed Abel out of jealousy. But no one talks about how lonely Cain must’ve been after. How quiet the world is when you’ve murdered the only thing that ever looked at you like you mattered.That’s what it feels like now. A world full of noise and none of it for me.

The mark isn’t on my skin. It’s behind my eyes. It’s in my teeth when I clench too hard, in the way I flinch at mirrors. I see her in everything: traffic lights, supermarket aisles, the space next to me on the couch. I talk to her like she’s still in the room.

She never really left, anyway. I never let her.